A PORTRAIT OF FREEDOM

Jul 31

THINGS I WISH I COULD HAVE TOLD MYSELF ONE YEAR AGO, on the eve of my bilateral mastectomy surgery (with flat aesthetic closure).

You will be okay.
But first you will experience pain.
You will grieve. Deeply.
But your friends and family will carry you.
You will find hope when you document this experience and share it.
You will tear down and rebuild your beliefs about femininity (and gender).
You will go swimming topless and it will feel so good.
You will get tattoos that will help you love your body (and find an irreplaceable friend in your tattooer).
You will learn that clothes exist to work FOR our bodies, not the other way around.
You will realize your worth is not found in your appearance.
You will wear makeup less and dress for comfort more.
You will fall into the well of self hate (at first) but this will reveal the beliefs you held so close — too close to your face for you to actually see — so you will grow tired of hating your body and decide to accept it instead. And you will fall deep into LOVE
You will create a new type of portrait session to offer your clients — inviting them to accept themselves AS THEY ARE — and it will fill you up in ways you never thought possible.
And one year from now you will look back on this nightmare, this necessary disfiguration, and you will be thankful because it freed you.